A Word of Advice?
Like I've said in a previous post, I have several friends getting married soon. In fact, the next 2 weekends I'll be wedding-it-up. We are super excited. I have to go to a shower for the latter wedding the first weekend before the first wedding (we're going to be very busy). Part of the festivities of the bridal shower is that we are supposed to write messages of advice on cute little pieces of stationary for the bride-to-be. Now, my hubby and I have been together for a good 5 years, but we've only been married for 5 months. I've learned some valuable things and received lots of good advice at my wedding, but I know a lot of you who check in with me have years on me in this department. What advice would you offer a newlywed? This is the couple who are both in the Navy and in the same community. They will be apart for at least several months just starting out. She's ''hoping to see him at thanksgiving and Christmas" (how sad is that?!) So, I have a few words to offer myself, but I am interested to see what all of you have to say. She, and I, will appreciate your encouraging words.
posted by BekABoo | 11:10 PM
4 Comments:
i'd say, never underestimate the power of touch...a hand on a shoulder, a squeeze on the arm, especially after a fight. It doesn't mean you're over it, it just keeps the doors open. It says, I may still be mad but I do love you.
Also the gift you give by admitting wrong, accepting your part of the problem and apologizing. Not that you necessarily take all the blame or admit total defeat(although you should if you're at fault)...but you can always apologize for something..., your tone, your word choice, your timing...this too keeps the doors of communication open. My 2 cents...:)
I've been married over 40 years...lots of ups and downs! What was the glue that held it together in the downs and made it over the top in the ups? Always considering what would be pleasing to God. Threats of divorce..not an option..words spoken can't be taken back and can remain hurtful for eternity. I'd say think before you speak and consider the tone of voice your using. Even harmless words can hurt when spoken in the wrong tone.
Also, I LOVE Cheryl's comment on the power of touch...what wisdom!
check out Barb's post on how couples met here http://anewchelseamorning.blogspot.com/
Very romatic and maybe osme good wisdom there.
I can't claim originality on most of these. And we've only been married 17 years. I know some of your other readers have much more wisom on this than I do.
-Never go to bed angry.
-Sometimes you just gotta' "put up with it" (this advice borrowed from someone's grandmother). I think it's cute, and true!
-Communicate.
-Never call each other names (except cute pet names!). ;-)
-Never even threaten with the word "divorce".
-Be a servant to your spouse.
-Pray for each other.
-Make the most of "alone" time--especially once you have kids.
-During times apart, keep a journal to give each other when you're back together. You'll be able to share things you might forget about days later.
-Lots of love and hugs will do wonders!
-Don't always try to have all the answers. Sometimes your spouse just needs a listening ear, a shoulder to lean on, and to know they have your support.
That's my two cents' worth! :-)
Post a Comment
<< Home